Bits and pieces are going on in my mind at the moment. As a private person it’s not particularly bloggable but what I thought I could do is share at least one of the insights I have been able to uncover. More may be able to be shared in the future but I haven’t got my head around them enough to put it out there.
In psychiatric/psychological assessment it can be common practice to obtain a family history. Information such as past history of psychological diagnosis, problems with alcohol or gambling, genograms outlining family relationships, births, deaths and if thorough, medical diagnosis of presenting person and immediate connections. What can also be obtained either through direct questioning or discussion is familial patterns. Familial patterns of illness, of coping, of relationships and interactions and how they impact upon the persons presentation or diagnosis or quite simply what makes the tick. What makes them who they are.
The genogram is a descriptive pictorial of this but the client or the clinician can also recognise these themes during the discussion.
Let’s just say over recent weeks I’ve been clearly able to illuminate a familial pattern of behaviour, coping and a basic life long pattern of those who have gone before me.
My own familial patterns have never been off limits in my own analysis and introspection as I attempt to further understand myself, my relationships and those around me. What is different this time is that I’ve had an “aha” moment you would say that I have to change the modus operandi. It’s not that it couldn’t continue to be the way of life as I could quite easily live out this life in this way. The problem for me is that now the spotlight has been shone upon it so clearly I can’t sit with it anymore.
I’m a very straight forward person in that my thoughts have got to the point where 90% of the time they reflect my actions. Incongruency doesn’t sit well with me. As I get older the tolerance becomes less, yes it may be hard on myself but I would do my head in daily if I didn’t act on the issues that came to the forefront of my mind. They sit like a razor blade jutting out of the ground, nicking my soul and aura the longer the issue sits with me without action.
This doesn’t mean I resolve everything immediately as it comes to light. Unfortunately Ms Impatient still has to sit with timing and reflection for some issues as they just can’t happen overnight. It’s just not possible.
So currently I’m on the path of further unravelling and understanding. Leading to the ultimate shift and change.
Unfortunately I know that patterns aren’t always easy to break and they will require courage, resilience and belief to stick to my own path and TRUST that I will be guided in the direction that will raise my spirit.
Have you broken any family patterns? Have you recently been illuminated to some and are working out what or how to deal with the information?