I’ve had a couple of themes come up of late in and surrounding me. Interestingly when an idea or theme arrives in my mind to ponder it also reflected by those around me as usual and that’s when I know I need to give it more thought. Not that these recent themes are encompassing my life but I suppose it makes me think how can I make my life better. How can I live my best life as they say.
So in usual fashion I thought I put them out into the blogosphere to ponder further.
I don’t even know how this theme arrived but it did so last week.
What made an impact on me was that i finally had a realisation I had never had in the past. Competition is fear. Mostly fear of oneself failing. When we are placed into a situation where it evokes competition it rarely brings out the best in us. Yes we can “win” something but ultimately it also puts us in a position for the potential to “lose”.
In other incidents the situation shouldnt be about winning and losing but it becomes that way with conditioning and external influences. If we were to sit quietly in stillness and listened to our true feelings the idea of competition and fear would not be the immediate reactions.
Therefore acting outside of our true nature whether it be through impulse of the age old flight-fight response (I have spoken about anxiety and this concept further in other posts), through as I previously mentioned conditioning by family, school, peers or sport or by fear invoked by ego; competition and its feelings arise.
Colette Baron Reid in her Hidden Realm oracle cards explains it perfectly:
“Life is not a competition. The concept of competition is flawed and encourages a perception of lack. If you feel competition its a time to ask for the highest intentions to replace the old ones.”
I’m no saint. In the past I was very competitive. Mainly only with sport as Mums Word can attest through my blog comment about white line fever. Although if someone was encroaching on my ground for anything that I was particularly focused on (read fanatical) then they also had a run for their money.
As I’ve gotten older I’ve mellowed but I’ve also made a clear choice about not participating in most competitive arenas until I can control my impulses. Honestly, true story my mum would not let me play in the same netball and basketball team as her because I was so competitive. She found me another team and they had to put up with me. Yes looking back I’m ashamed. I didn’t know at the time though.
Now, particularly in recent months and even the last few weeks I have had some revelations and thankfully have caught my reactions and thoughts and really had a ponder about how I chose to move forward. I don’t know whether its age/maturity or whether I am getting much better at immediate self-reflection and action. all I know is that I’m learning a whole lot quicker than I used to. Show me and experience a difficulty or a reaction that sets me into the non flowing, easy-going self and I’m straight onto wondering what on earth has happened to me and why I am thinking such thoughts. A blessing really.
What brings me back quickly is always thinking about my intention. The competitiveness or fear is abruptly halted when I look at what my intention is and whether this intention is about me or about someone else, and finally whether it is held with good intention with no harm to others or myself. Emotional, physical, spiritual. Holistically.
Although I think what is healthy is competition with yourself to improve. Though it still goes back to intention. Who are you doing it for and why?
How do you go with competition? Is it fear based? Is there any competition that is healthy?