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Behaviour, Chakras, Identity, Love, Mindfulness, Relationships, Self, Spirituality, Winter Solstice

Venus Flytrap

I’m getting closer to changing behaviour. I did hesitate to press publish but I know I’m not the only one who may do this. Also if I write this then maybe just maybe I will be accountable. Writing in some ways solidifies it just that little bit more than thinking it in my brain.

As many posts have alluded to over recent months this year has been a massive year of growth. It hasn’t been easy. Yeah the smiles on the dial and I’m a positive and optimistic person but let’s just say those years in the theatre group and numerous stage performances in local productions have helped my character portrayal. I’m still being myself, its just that the “on” button hasnt been switched 24/7 and my contact with others has been reduced to accomodate this.

It’s interesting I’ve been teetering on the edge of this issue for a few months now. I did a lot of work on the heart chakra with the help of people and situations that life presented me with {You know who you are and I am grateful, enormously}. Unfortunately I’ve felt myself regress recently and in fact even to the point where a small incident yesterday has me on the brink of snapping back fully to the place I’ve been at for years with my encapsulated heart and its expressed feelings and emotions of love and care. In my minds eye it looks like the Venus flytrap plant. Snapping closed. Also in my minds eye are my hands grabbing the flowers edges and seeing the strain and strength in attempting to hold open/ reopen the plant. The image feels like I’m pulling at some resistance bands that just want to flick back together. My brain is in conflict because it knows it’s been there before. It’s the default habit and holding of self. It also knows I’ve worked so hard to open it that I’m desperate for it not to close again. I know how much work, trust, a leap in blind faith it took to actually open it to the point it was at, the most open it has ever been. My brain is pleading not to let it snap close because it will mean starting from a similar point again…..do I have the energy, strength, willpower and ultimately trust to let it open again…..

Yes this can relate to major relationships but it also relates to the minor or peripheral relationships that would appear not to have too much impact on your life…but it’s in the detail that tips you over. We know what results from our major relationships being affected. We tend to be a bit more prepared to deal with the fall out, but because of these types of relationships taking up a lot of strength it’s the little incidents that cause the overflow or the “final straw” as the saying goes.

I realised though that it’s my ego talking, not my heart when it goes to slam shut. There are many forms the ego takes: feelings hurt, misunderstandings, expectations and self esteem. But if we are purely living in a heart centered space then the flower in your minds eye would shift from the Venus flytrap to a beautiful rose {or similar} in bloom. Heart centered thinking an living realises that it is not personal, that to love and act without condition will help to keep the heart open, that our actions are not based on the REaction of someone else and that gratitude fills the hearts cup by focusing on that which we are blessed with not that which we are not. Finally I believe it is about Peace. Peace, knowing that in the whole picture, the incident that threatens our hearts to close up and stop giving as a protective mechanism would not rate too highly in the grand scheme of life.

In some ways by publishing this post it strengthens the flower walls to stay open. In the past I wouldn’t have even given it the time to reflect, the action of slamming shut would’ve occurred as reflex. I’m getting there…..I hope this shows you’re not alone. I feel I am metaphorically approaching a Winters end just as our season here in the southern hemisphere is too. The season of Ostara is time to bloom.

Always evolving. Forever learning.

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About Bringing Spirit Into The Everyday

Modern Suburban Hippie (minus hallucinogens :) ) Vegetarian. Passionate. Love Laughs. Yoga. Chai Lattes. Crystals. Oracle cards. Goddesses. Angels. Spiritual. Perfume Loving. Intuitive Parenting. Breastfeeding Mama. Sport Loving. Opinionated. Scorpio. Psychologist. I have 3 little people who rock my world.

Discussion

2 thoughts on “Venus Flytrap

  1. HI Cath, you’re not alone. I also feel like I’m coming out of a big Winter. A BIG, long Winter that’s lasted over a year. Hang in there, you’re doing great. Acknowledgment and will to break patterns is more than half the battle xxx

    Posted by Twitchy (@TwitchyCorner) | August 30, 2012, 4:17 pm

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  1. Pingback: Filling in the gaps | Bringing Spirit Into The Everyday - March 17, 2013

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